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本文摘要:This week Apple unveiled three new iPhones and two new watches, which means its time for the tech conspiracy theorists to go off about their current phones glitching . Just like clockwork, each new product release comes with complaints and, of course, lots and lots of memes.这周苹果公司发布了三款苹果手机上新型,也有2款苹果腕表新型。

This week Apple unveiled three new iPhones and two new watches, which means its time for the tech conspiracy theorists to go off about their current phones glitching . Just like clockwork, each new product release comes with complaints and, of course, lots and lots of memes.这周苹果公司发布了三款苹果手机上新型,也有2款苹果腕表新型。这意味著,这些持有者阴谋的理工男们调侃她们目前的手机上的情况下又来到。一环扣一环,各届苹果新产品发布会都是会造成诸多拨给的调侃,自然,也有许多的戏仿搞笑段子。

1.The only upgrade I care about我唯一关注的升級Apples accessories can last only a year. my chargers and headphones are shedding its skin as soon as it hits a year. Then i thought, APPLEs way of making money every year.苹果的数码配件都仅有一年的使用期。時间一到,我的充电电池线和手机耳机都刚开始蜕皮了,随后我也不容易要想,我觉得便是苹果公司每一年的发财之路吗?2.FaceTime with up to 32 people at once.抵制多的人及时视频通话,数最多总数32人。Sorry but I don’t know 3 people who would want to talk to me at once.说些什么,我掌握的人群中,想另外跟我闲聊的人不高达3个。

Imagine hearing Can you see me? I cant see you! 32 times at once! Al right, I can see the necessity of speaking with 20-30 people at once, but I really dont see a reason to use the phone at that time. Such a teleconference usually involves stationary computers, where it makes a lot of sense, much like any teleconference software.想像一下,另外听到32本人讲到“你可以看到我吗?我看到你呢!”行吧,我否定我有时候不容易务必另外跟20-30本人闲聊,但我敢说任何借口、在这类状况下用手机做为社交软件。那样的多的人远程视频会议一般来说不容易选用台式机,或是别的远程视频会议手机软件,那样有理有据的多。3.With your current account balance, which apple product can you buy?以你现阶段的资产收入支出状况,你承受的了苹果的哪些商品?Apple juice.苹果汁Yeah with the price of the most expensive one I can easily get a new set of summer and winter tyres that I actually need. So its new tyres, apple juice and sticking with my perfectly functioning IPhone 8.是的,以市场价最少的新型的价钱,我能卖给一套夏天车胎和冬季轮胎,这才就是我的确务必的。


所以我得到 的是新的车胎,苹果汁,随后以后用以我的苹果8手机上,特性完美哟。4.New Apple Watch can detect if you’ve fallen down and will call emergency services if you are immobile for one minute.最新款苹果腕表能检验到你否摔倒,假如你一分钟以内保持原地不动,它就不容易给你启用急救车。


Drinking with an Apple Watch on just got interesting.带著苹果腕表去喝闷酒,变成了很有趣的事儿哟。If you trip on a banana skin, brush your knee, and an ambulance comes, will you be ready to pay for the huge insane bill??假如你一不小心遇到香蕉皮滑了一跤,弹簧片了膝关节,你的苹果腕表就给你找来了急救车,你不肯交纳巨额的抢救医疗费用吗?5.Yes, for many people its all about the brand究竟,对很多人而言,她们只看重哪个商标logo。

6.Me: Please make durable charging cables.我:要求生产制造些轻便的充电电池线。Apple: Here take a phone similar to the last one.苹果公司:要求拿回这一跟原来型号类似的最新款手机!Me: But cable我:但是我想充电电池线。Apple: Okay take a new watch too苹果公司:行吧,要求再次拿回这一新的腕表。

Me: What about the cable though我:但是充电电池线该怎么办……Meanwhile, the cables get old after a month.值得一提的是,充电电池线用一个月就脆化了。7.Don’t buy the new iPhone. Impree your friends and save money by simply writing “Sent from my IPhone XS Max” at the end of each email.必须卖最新款的苹果手机上,你只务必在每封电子邮件下边写成上“来源于我的新苹果XS Max”就讫,那样既能划算,还能在盆友眼前炫耀一下。How does owning an iphone impress people, i wonder...具有一只苹果手机上就能在盆友眼前炫耀吗?我答复猜想……8.Apple Watch series 4 detects fall, detects low heart rate, can do ECG.苹果腕表4能检测配戴者否发现异常摔倒或是颤动发现异常,还能保证心电图检查So they were right“an Apple a day keeps doctor away.”因此 讲到这句话是对的,“一天一个苹果,医师不出去找我聊。

”Thats actually very cool - and something like this would be VERY helpful for older people who live alone.这一作用显而易见挺棒的——针对群居动物的老年人而言,这一作用不容易十分简易。9.No, just more expensive to buy and more difficult for the children in China to build.不,仅仅售价更为喜,我国的职工保证一起也更为何以了。10.Method of payment for the new XS and XS Max售卖最新款 XS 和XS Max的交纳方法It literally sound like excess and excess max. I think theyre just mocking their customers now.听得一起很像 excess(太过划算的) and excess max(太过划算且仅次的)。我猜到苹果公司早就刚开始嘲笑她们的顾客了。

11.The new Apple Watch will detect low heart rate and make ECGS.最新款苹果腕表能够检验颤动发现异常,能够保证心电图检查。The next iPhone will also perform the surgery required to sell your kidney to pay for it.下一款新式手机上或许不容易有作业者手术的作用,你卖给手机上后,它能大哥你摘除肾脏功能拿来卖掉,以交纳新机需要的花费。

Never fails to make me laugh看一次哈哈大笑一次。12.Now that the new iPhone is out…I can now finally afford a second hand iPhone 4如今苹果开售新型了……我再一能够卖给一只二手苹果4手机了。

As a fellow South African, I feel this on a spiritual level.做为一个巴西富豪,我不能在精神层面上讲解你……13.Once upon a time好久好久之前。Does Less. Costs More. Its That Stupid. -Apple作用更为较少,价钱高些。


便是那么屌。——苹果14.My iPhone immediately after the Apple Event.苹果新产品发布会以后,我的苹果手机上突然就是这样了。OMG YES! They do it on purpose!就这样,她们认可是故意的!15.This is how I see the new iPhone.这是我眼里的苹果新机型。

True眉开眼笑!16.Do you remember the time?你要忘掉这个时候吗?To be fair that was the on contract price Which I would gladly go back to doing.账面价值的讲到,它是协议价,但是,我还是十分愿意重返这个时候。17.Difference between iPhone X and iPhone XS Max苹果X与苹果XS Max彼此之间的区别barely anything彻底没区别18.Apple doesn’t always launch new products苹果公司会经常发布新产品。


But when they do, they don’t.万一她们发布了新产品,她们发布的也不是新产品。Sigh. I miss him.哎,我想要他了。19.This is how I see the new iPhone.我眼里的苹果新机型。

accurate就这样!20.The iPhone XXX be like苹果XXX不容易会是那样的iPhone XXXL扩大号苹果21.How I feel eveytime I watch an Apple Event.每一次我觉得苹果的新产品发布会,我的觉得全是那样的。Don’t be fooled. She’s just a regular Malibu Stacy with a stupid , cheap hat.别骗了,她便是一个一般的Malibu Stacy小孩,再加一顶又傻乎乎又便宜的斗笠!But she’s got a new hat.但是她有新的斗笠呀!I want it. I want it. I want it.我想!我想!我想!Barbie doll makers = phone makers. same same , diff year is all.苹果生产商和公仔生产商一样。岁岁年年机相仿,我不相信爱情。